We spent the last 3 days cleaning the house from top to bottom. Our house is certainly not dirty, but it is lived in...it looks like there are two people and two weiner dogs living in it! Dishes sometimes live in the sink for a day or two before they make it to the dishwasher, our living room is littered with dog toys, and we've been known to have stray socks left on the floor of the bedroom. Not today! The house almost looks more like a show home than a lived-in home. All the throw blankets are folded neatly on the couch and ottoman, the guest room isn't storing an assortment of off-season clothing strewn across the bed, and the office (which also serves as the dogs' bedroom) is cleaner than the day we moved in.
The social worker from our adoption agency showed up around 4pm, for what we assumed would be a 2 hour meeting or so. (That's what all the paperwork said.) She sat with us in the living room and did the "interview" part of the visit first. In this interview, she asked us basic biographical questions (dates of birth and marriage, number of siblings, parents' occupations, etcc.) as well as questions that probed deeper (what our childhoods were like, what our relationships with our siblings are like, why we decided to start dating each other, and ultimately why we decided to marry each other). We had to talk about how we think our lives will change when we get a baby, how we plan to discipline our child, why we each thought the other person would be a good parent, and why we want to be parents in the first place. We had to describe our infertility status for the third time with this agency (in short: 5 years married, no baby, but no tests to determine why).
The interview portion of the visit lasted just about an hour. Then it was time for the tour. The social worker checked to make sure that we had a smoke detector within 10 feet of each bedroom door (easy to comply with, since that's what our apartment management company needs to comply with their insurance policy), a fire extinguisher and carbon monoxide detector on each floor of the house, and a room separate from ours for the baby (we will be converting our guest room). If we had weapons or a pool (we have neither), she woulld have also checked to make sure that we were takig proper precautions to secure those. The social worker looked in each room of the house, but moved quickly through the tour. All in all, she only took about 15 minutes to check our home.
Overall, it was a stressful day or two leading up to our visit, but I have to agree with others who say that the actual visit wasn't nearly as bad as I had worked it up to be in my head. From here, we each have to have a physical. Once that paperwork is in our agency's hands, the social worker will draft our home study document. We wil review the document, then the agency staff reviews it to make sure we pass. It is then submtted to the state of Indiana for review as a petition to adopt. Once it is submitted to the state, the agency wil begin showing our biography book to potential birth mothers.
Thank yuo all for the incredible outporing of love, prayers, good thoughts, and well wishes during this entire process. You all have no idea how amazing it is to know that we have so many people supporting us through this long, emotional process.
Love, Stephanie
P.S. I've hard from some folks that they "stalk" the blog almost daily...We'll try to be better at updating more regularly!!
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